Mothers who know stand strong and immovable.
“Who will prepare this righteous generation of sons and daughters? Latter-day Saint women will do this—women who know and love the Lord and bear testimony of Him, women who are strong and immovable and who do not give up during difficult and discouraging times.”
I want to be that LDS woman! I want to “teach children the ways of truth.” I want to be “the vest best in the world at upholding, nurturing and protecting families” MY FAMILY!
We do this by staying true to the gospel ordinances and covenants and by following the prophets. We can stand strong and immovable during the rocky times. I’m sure we all go through those times and sometimes it feels as if we never make it all that through, but like Princess Buttercup and Wesley (The Princess Bride), while in the midst of the fire swamp, listen to what happens just before danger and avoid them. In our world, it is usually the prophet telling us to be careful and be aware. If we follow we need not be afraid.
Friday, February 29, 2008
Mothers who Know part 6
Mothers who know do less
I think this is the one that rattled a few cages and it did mine at first, until I let the Spirit teach me the truth in what she was saying.
“They permit less of what will not bear good fruit eternally.” Let me repeat that, “They permit less of what will not bear good fruit eternally.”
Less media. We are just about ready to disconnect our dish network. I’m having a hard time since that means no BYU TV and no summer Olympics, world cup, winter Olympics and my cooking shows (I’m learning). But maybe we don’t need it. I ‘m sure we can use the money elsewhere (like college funds) but we have not let much in so we really can’t go less. But we can be wise in how we use what we do have. I can sit down and mindlessly watch a cooking show or a world cup.
Less distractions. I’m not sure what she was trying to say here, but I think she was saying things that draw us away from our purpose and our family. Things that make us draw into our selves instead of with our family. Well, we play games (My hubby sells board games) and we have a blast playing together. We have a blast learning together as well.
Less activity that draws children away from the home. Here is one that I have had shoved in my face (ok, they did is gently) but the ward has been shaking their finger at me because I do so much. BUT when I tried to tell them my son couldn’t do something because it was pulling our family away from the home, boy did I get read the riot act. I was damned if I did and damned if I didn’t. There are two things here for me. One is soccer. If you have read my four part article on LDS-NHA on soccer you will know what a HUGE place soccer has in my family. You would think I have super stars or something like that. On the contrary. My kids only play rec soccer and then move into reffing as it is great money ($30/hr for a 14 year old!—I want that pay.) But we do it as a family. My kids pile into my car at 4 and we all go to the same place and play together, cheer together, win together, cry together and come home together. I had one mom look at me and say, “How do you do sports for five boys?” (She was struggling with her two boys and two girls.) I told her, that we choose a family sport and we did it all together. That not only makes it so we are together as a family, but I get to watch my children play and even participate as a coach. She was running boy 1 to baseball all over town and boy 2 to football on the opposite side of town. Girl 1 was in ballet in another town and girl 2 was just being dragged around. She never saw her son play football—not ONE game. I have a child that I rarely saw play soccer last year, because he played at the same time as another brother, BUT his oldest brother was his coach and dad made it to his games. I actually have managed to get six kids playing soccer at the same time and we still get to sit down for dinner. OK, so the dinner was pizza picked up on the way home, but we did it together! I have actually lessened the time we are away from each other by bringing us all together. My kids know you go and support each other on the field. We even watch them ref a game. We may be AWAY from home, but we are doing it together.
Live on less and consume less. We have been hit hard the last little bit by the down turn in the economy and it is showing up in our dwindling saving account. That and our boys are eating us out of house and home. I actually had to pick up a part time job (direct sells) to help pay for necessities. The cost of insurance for a 16 year old BOY driver is sky high!! (even with good student discounts) and the cost of orthodontia and clothes! HOW CAN THEY GROW SO FAST! (At least they can hand them down.) and then saving for six kids who will be going to college. I’m not sure how we are going to weather college and missions all happening at the same time. We figured it out once that for nine years we will have a missionary out in the field and during those same nine years for the majority of the time we will have at least three college students. We have NO IDEA how we are going to manage even a tenth of that cost. So by nature we have to consume less. Of course I need to consume less calories and fat, but that is another topic. This also brings about a teaching topic that I think I haven’t taught very well with my kids. We live in a throw-away society and now that their toys and clothes cost so much, we are trying to instill in them that you just don’t throw something away. You use it up, reuse it, pass it down, etc. My teens are having a hard time with this and I’m not sure how to go about teaching this. I’m truly to do it by example, but I’m not sure they are seeing.
In order to spend more time with their children. The whole reason we picked soccer and skiing. Two things we can do as a family.
More time eating together. We switched from eating dinner together to eating breakfast. We were having a hard time making sure we all ate together and still made it to bed on time that we switched from trying to eat dinner together to eating breakfast together. I LOVE IT! We still try for dinner time together, but it often doesn’t work out. Monday (FHE) is about the only night we really eat together. Tuesday night my husband has game night (I think of it as work since that is what he does as a side job and it has paid a few bills). Wednesday is activity night and the kids don’t get home until 8:30 or 9 and it is trying to get dinner on the table. Not only that, they need to eat before they leave. Thursday night is when all the moms meetings and parties are. Friday is date night or Teen night at my house. Saturday always sneaks up on us as we are so busy or it is temple night. Sunday is my day of rest—I don’t cook on Sunday.
More time working together. Forget the lawn service, do it with your kids! Forget the maid service, do it with your kids! We have built three decks together and just remodeled our kitchen. We did it as a family! How great that was!
More time reading together. How many homes out there do you think read with their teens? Probably not many. We do. We are reading a couple books together. Just recently my husband transcribed his mission journals and is reading those to us at night. HOW WONDERFUL! My teens are so pumped for their missions. They can’t wait to have similar experiences.
More time having fun (I combined her last points). Does your family really like being together? If not, then why?
These mothers choose carefully and do not try to choose it all. I think I touched on that during my discussion about our choice of soccer. I didn’t choose it all, I choose what was best for my family (see Elder Oaks’ talk on Good, Better, Best) and I will stand by that decision until directed otherwise.
I did this so that I, like Sister Beck says, “prepare future fathers and mothers.” I can only hope that my example will last for a while and they too can choose less for their family, but in doing so pick the best and have more!
I think this is the one that rattled a few cages and it did mine at first, until I let the Spirit teach me the truth in what she was saying.
“They permit less of what will not bear good fruit eternally.” Let me repeat that, “They permit less of what will not bear good fruit eternally.”
Less media. We are just about ready to disconnect our dish network. I’m having a hard time since that means no BYU TV and no summer Olympics, world cup, winter Olympics and my cooking shows (I’m learning). But maybe we don’t need it. I ‘m sure we can use the money elsewhere (like college funds) but we have not let much in so we really can’t go less. But we can be wise in how we use what we do have. I can sit down and mindlessly watch a cooking show or a world cup.
Less distractions. I’m not sure what she was trying to say here, but I think she was saying things that draw us away from our purpose and our family. Things that make us draw into our selves instead of with our family. Well, we play games (My hubby sells board games) and we have a blast playing together. We have a blast learning together as well.
Less activity that draws children away from the home. Here is one that I have had shoved in my face (ok, they did is gently) but the ward has been shaking their finger at me because I do so much. BUT when I tried to tell them my son couldn’t do something because it was pulling our family away from the home, boy did I get read the riot act. I was damned if I did and damned if I didn’t. There are two things here for me. One is soccer. If you have read my four part article on LDS-NHA on soccer you will know what a HUGE place soccer has in my family. You would think I have super stars or something like that. On the contrary. My kids only play rec soccer and then move into reffing as it is great money ($30/hr for a 14 year old!—I want that pay.) But we do it as a family. My kids pile into my car at 4 and we all go to the same place and play together, cheer together, win together, cry together and come home together. I had one mom look at me and say, “How do you do sports for five boys?” (She was struggling with her two boys and two girls.) I told her, that we choose a family sport and we did it all together. That not only makes it so we are together as a family, but I get to watch my children play and even participate as a coach. She was running boy 1 to baseball all over town and boy 2 to football on the opposite side of town. Girl 1 was in ballet in another town and girl 2 was just being dragged around. She never saw her son play football—not ONE game. I have a child that I rarely saw play soccer last year, because he played at the same time as another brother, BUT his oldest brother was his coach and dad made it to his games. I actually have managed to get six kids playing soccer at the same time and we still get to sit down for dinner. OK, so the dinner was pizza picked up on the way home, but we did it together! I have actually lessened the time we are away from each other by bringing us all together. My kids know you go and support each other on the field. We even watch them ref a game. We may be AWAY from home, but we are doing it together.
Live on less and consume less. We have been hit hard the last little bit by the down turn in the economy and it is showing up in our dwindling saving account. That and our boys are eating us out of house and home. I actually had to pick up a part time job (direct sells) to help pay for necessities. The cost of insurance for a 16 year old BOY driver is sky high!! (even with good student discounts) and the cost of orthodontia and clothes! HOW CAN THEY GROW SO FAST! (At least they can hand them down.) and then saving for six kids who will be going to college. I’m not sure how we are going to weather college and missions all happening at the same time. We figured it out once that for nine years we will have a missionary out in the field and during those same nine years for the majority of the time we will have at least three college students. We have NO IDEA how we are going to manage even a tenth of that cost. So by nature we have to consume less. Of course I need to consume less calories and fat, but that is another topic. This also brings about a teaching topic that I think I haven’t taught very well with my kids. We live in a throw-away society and now that their toys and clothes cost so much, we are trying to instill in them that you just don’t throw something away. You use it up, reuse it, pass it down, etc. My teens are having a hard time with this and I’m not sure how to go about teaching this. I’m truly to do it by example, but I’m not sure they are seeing.
In order to spend more time with their children. The whole reason we picked soccer and skiing. Two things we can do as a family.
More time eating together. We switched from eating dinner together to eating breakfast. We were having a hard time making sure we all ate together and still made it to bed on time that we switched from trying to eat dinner together to eating breakfast together. I LOVE IT! We still try for dinner time together, but it often doesn’t work out. Monday (FHE) is about the only night we really eat together. Tuesday night my husband has game night (I think of it as work since that is what he does as a side job and it has paid a few bills). Wednesday is activity night and the kids don’t get home until 8:30 or 9 and it is trying to get dinner on the table. Not only that, they need to eat before they leave. Thursday night is when all the moms meetings and parties are. Friday is date night or Teen night at my house. Saturday always sneaks up on us as we are so busy or it is temple night. Sunday is my day of rest—I don’t cook on Sunday.
More time working together. Forget the lawn service, do it with your kids! Forget the maid service, do it with your kids! We have built three decks together and just remodeled our kitchen. We did it as a family! How great that was!
More time reading together. How many homes out there do you think read with their teens? Probably not many. We do. We are reading a couple books together. Just recently my husband transcribed his mission journals and is reading those to us at night. HOW WONDERFUL! My teens are so pumped for their missions. They can’t wait to have similar experiences.
More time having fun (I combined her last points). Does your family really like being together? If not, then why?
These mothers choose carefully and do not try to choose it all. I think I touched on that during my discussion about our choice of soccer. I didn’t choose it all, I choose what was best for my family (see Elder Oaks’ talk on Good, Better, Best) and I will stand by that decision until directed otherwise.
I did this so that I, like Sister Beck says, “prepare future fathers and mothers.” I can only hope that my example will last for a while and they too can choose less for their family, but in doing so pick the best and have more!
Mothers who Know part 5
Mothers who know are teachers
Can I say DUH again and now sound stupid?
“Think of the power of our future missionary force if mothers considered their home as a pre-missionary training center.” When I was done having babies I asked what my next mission was and I was told I was raising missionaries. That has been my objective since then. My kids are to know the doctrines of the gospel and they will know it before they get into the MTC and if they don’t it won’t be because I didn’t teach them. It will because they didn’t want to learn.
I truly hope they say their MTC experience was just a refresher course. Not sure that will happen, but I’m hoping and praying that it will be true for all six of them.
But in D&C 88 it also tells us other thing that our missionaries need to know. They need to know a lot more than just the gospel, but the gospel is first and foremost. They need to know history, spelling, grammar, laws, geography, science and how to take care of their self and property. A well rounded boy or girl makes the best missionary.
Our job is never over and we need to continually teach them.
Can I say DUH again and now sound stupid?
“Think of the power of our future missionary force if mothers considered their home as a pre-missionary training center.” When I was done having babies I asked what my next mission was and I was told I was raising missionaries. That has been my objective since then. My kids are to know the doctrines of the gospel and they will know it before they get into the MTC and if they don’t it won’t be because I didn’t teach them. It will because they didn’t want to learn.
I truly hope they say their MTC experience was just a refresher course. Not sure that will happen, but I’m hoping and praying that it will be true for all six of them.
But in D&C 88 it also tells us other thing that our missionaries need to know. They need to know a lot more than just the gospel, but the gospel is first and foremost. They need to know history, spelling, grammar, laws, geography, science and how to take care of their self and property. A well rounded boy or girl makes the best missionary.
Our job is never over and we need to continually teach them.
Mothers who Know part 4
Mother who know are leaders
AMEN!
We lead in the family with our husbands. I watched a family that only had a mother be the leader and therefore I learned how to be a very strong leader in the family. I’ve had to learn how to tone it down and let the Priesthood leader in our home stake a turn. But I think we have a happy balance of leadership in our home.
Mothers do help plan the family calendar. Most of what is on the calendar is what I put there. Very few things are from my husband. Not that he wouldn’t put them there, but he is only him and I do everyone’s calendar. And most of the stuff happens when he isn’t here.
“They plan for missions,...”. At our home we don’t have the sentence, “If you serve a mission…” it is “WHEN you serve a mission…”
“...temple marriage,...” Again the wording is “WHEN” not “if”.
“...education.” For a homeschooling family, again I say, “DUH!” Education is the ticket to everything and anything.
I really don’t want my children to think they have a choice. Not that I’m brain washing them, but from the thought, “if you fail to plan then you plan to fail.” My children need to plan for missions, temple marriages and their education and I need to help them with it.
Right now we are dealing with a 16 year old who has a TON of money at his disposal right now and trying to train him, guide him to save it because it will be gone so quickly when you pay $15K for a year at school or for a mission. He doesn’t see the picture and of course knows more than his parents. So frustrating.
Just this morning we were discussing how to run a proper meeting. I was voicing my frustration at the lack of good use of time in meetings. I hate the 15 minutes spent on “touchy feely” things at the expense of items on the agenda. That really gets me going and I mentioned that at breakfast. That started a discussion on what makes a great leader. It was actually quite an enlightening topic for both parents and children.
“Worldly models of parenting” I’m chuckling. I was reading in the newspaper how Britney Spears is handling all the hubbub around her situation. The article stated that she has over $50 million in the bank and that she is supporting her family and how fast she will go through it with her current habits and troubles. It then went on to say how her little sister took a huge hit financially with the announcement that she is pregnant (remember she is only 16) and that her mother’s book deal fell through. This is that made me laugh; her mother’s book was on “parenting.” Just the person I want to take advice from—a mother whose two daughters are so screwed up. Our models for parenting are found in Elder Golden’s talk (the very next one). They are founded in principles of truth and right. They are founded in the gospel of Jesus Christ.
“These mothers are selective about their own activities and involvement to conserve their limited strength in order to maximize their influence where it matters most.” HOME! In other words—moms come home!
AMEN!
We lead in the family with our husbands. I watched a family that only had a mother be the leader and therefore I learned how to be a very strong leader in the family. I’ve had to learn how to tone it down and let the Priesthood leader in our home stake a turn. But I think we have a happy balance of leadership in our home.
Mothers do help plan the family calendar. Most of what is on the calendar is what I put there. Very few things are from my husband. Not that he wouldn’t put them there, but he is only him and I do everyone’s calendar. And most of the stuff happens when he isn’t here.
“They plan for missions,...”. At our home we don’t have the sentence, “If you serve a mission…” it is “WHEN you serve a mission…”
“...temple marriage,...” Again the wording is “WHEN” not “if”.
“...education.” For a homeschooling family, again I say, “DUH!” Education is the ticket to everything and anything.
I really don’t want my children to think they have a choice. Not that I’m brain washing them, but from the thought, “if you fail to plan then you plan to fail.” My children need to plan for missions, temple marriages and their education and I need to help them with it.
Right now we are dealing with a 16 year old who has a TON of money at his disposal right now and trying to train him, guide him to save it because it will be gone so quickly when you pay $15K for a year at school or for a mission. He doesn’t see the picture and of course knows more than his parents. So frustrating.
Just this morning we were discussing how to run a proper meeting. I was voicing my frustration at the lack of good use of time in meetings. I hate the 15 minutes spent on “touchy feely” things at the expense of items on the agenda. That really gets me going and I mentioned that at breakfast. That started a discussion on what makes a great leader. It was actually quite an enlightening topic for both parents and children.
“Worldly models of parenting” I’m chuckling. I was reading in the newspaper how Britney Spears is handling all the hubbub around her situation. The article stated that she has over $50 million in the bank and that she is supporting her family and how fast she will go through it with her current habits and troubles. It then went on to say how her little sister took a huge hit financially with the announcement that she is pregnant (remember she is only 16) and that her mother’s book deal fell through. This is that made me laugh; her mother’s book was on “parenting.” Just the person I want to take advice from—a mother whose two daughters are so screwed up. Our models for parenting are found in Elder Golden’s talk (the very next one). They are founded in principles of truth and right. They are founded in the gospel of Jesus Christ.
“These mothers are selective about their own activities and involvement to conserve their limited strength in order to maximize their influence where it matters most.” HOME! In other words—moms come home!
Mothers who Know part 3
Mother who know are nurturers.
As much as I want to just say “DUH!” I won’t insult those people who don’t get it. WHY? Because I’m one of them. I love my children, but I am not one who has dinner ready because I am doing other things with these kids.
I grew up in a home where by the time I rolled around, my mom was tired of fixing dinner, especially to kids who didn’t appreciate it. But more importantly she had to go to work if we wanted the basic necessities of life. I never really watched her cook dinner. Either I wasn’t there or she wasn’t there. But my mother cultivated, cared for and a made grow those children given to her.
I have chosen a different path for raising my children. I’m not handy in the kitchen because I just don’t know and being creative in the kitchen is not my strong suit. Not only that, I have chosen to be with my children at their activities. I will talk more about that in a later part.
I do wash clothes, well sort of. I have taught my children how to wash their own clothes. I only wash for Steve (and of course myself). I will also do some of the family laundry, but only when it overwhelms a child.
I’m not the best homemaker and often my home is a mess, with dishes all over the kitchen, muddy floors, leaves on the carpet, blankets strewn all over and books! PILES OF BOOKS. But you first must know why they are like that. My house is a mess because my children don’t leave the home for 8 hours to go to school. There are dishes all over the kitchen because we quickly eat to get back to learning or we are going somewhere or as the case usually is: someone isn’t doing their job. Muddy floors happen because I live in the NorthWET and we are outside ALL THE TIME! (even in the rain). My house isn’t clean because people live in it and learn in it.
My house isn’t painted pretty, decorated well or very presentable because I have chosen to spend the money elsewhere—on my kids’ education.
“Working beside children in the home.” You betcha! How else will children learn unless we model it for them.
“Create opportunities to teach and model qualities children should emulate.” I get so nervous about this one. Are my children seeing me learn or do they just see me teach it? Do my children see me as a model?
“...but all the education women attain will avail them nothing if they do not have the skill to make a home that creates a climate for spiritual growth.” AMEN to that statement, but I have to do a self check here. Does my home create a climate for spiritual growth? I can’t answer that, but I know I am trying. I truly am trying to make it that way. Of course it starts with ourselves and that is where I am right now.
“house of order” I laugh because I look at my desk and it isn’t very ordered and yet, I know where everything is. And of course every day, month, year holds something new to order. We use to hold family council about once every quarter, then it was once a month and now it is every Sunday. We are going so many different ways that we need to keep on top of things. My teens are beginning to live lives independent from me (crushing, but good) and I’m having a hard time with that, but it is good. We are trying harder to make a house of order. I just need to get our money and cooking in order and we will be better off.
“Nurturing requires organization, patience, love and work.” I’m putting that on my mirror.
“Helping growth occur through nurturing is truly a powerful and influential role bestowed on women.” Does He really trust us THAT MUCH!?!? WOW! I guess I better live up to it.
ps—I’m taking suggestions for quick, inexpensive, family filling recipes. Send them to doreenbl@waldsfe.org
As much as I want to just say “DUH!” I won’t insult those people who don’t get it. WHY? Because I’m one of them. I love my children, but I am not one who has dinner ready because I am doing other things with these kids.
I grew up in a home where by the time I rolled around, my mom was tired of fixing dinner, especially to kids who didn’t appreciate it. But more importantly she had to go to work if we wanted the basic necessities of life. I never really watched her cook dinner. Either I wasn’t there or she wasn’t there. But my mother cultivated, cared for and a made grow those children given to her.
I have chosen a different path for raising my children. I’m not handy in the kitchen because I just don’t know and being creative in the kitchen is not my strong suit. Not only that, I have chosen to be with my children at their activities. I will talk more about that in a later part.
I do wash clothes, well sort of. I have taught my children how to wash their own clothes. I only wash for Steve (and of course myself). I will also do some of the family laundry, but only when it overwhelms a child.
I’m not the best homemaker and often my home is a mess, with dishes all over the kitchen, muddy floors, leaves on the carpet, blankets strewn all over and books! PILES OF BOOKS. But you first must know why they are like that. My house is a mess because my children don’t leave the home for 8 hours to go to school. There are dishes all over the kitchen because we quickly eat to get back to learning or we are going somewhere or as the case usually is: someone isn’t doing their job. Muddy floors happen because I live in the NorthWET and we are outside ALL THE TIME! (even in the rain). My house isn’t clean because people live in it and learn in it.
My house isn’t painted pretty, decorated well or very presentable because I have chosen to spend the money elsewhere—on my kids’ education.
“Working beside children in the home.” You betcha! How else will children learn unless we model it for them.
“Create opportunities to teach and model qualities children should emulate.” I get so nervous about this one. Are my children seeing me learn or do they just see me teach it? Do my children see me as a model?
“...but all the education women attain will avail them nothing if they do not have the skill to make a home that creates a climate for spiritual growth.” AMEN to that statement, but I have to do a self check here. Does my home create a climate for spiritual growth? I can’t answer that, but I know I am trying. I truly am trying to make it that way. Of course it starts with ourselves and that is where I am right now.
“house of order” I laugh because I look at my desk and it isn’t very ordered and yet, I know where everything is. And of course every day, month, year holds something new to order. We use to hold family council about once every quarter, then it was once a month and now it is every Sunday. We are going so many different ways that we need to keep on top of things. My teens are beginning to live lives independent from me (crushing, but good) and I’m having a hard time with that, but it is good. We are trying harder to make a house of order. I just need to get our money and cooking in order and we will be better off.
“Nurturing requires organization, patience, love and work.” I’m putting that on my mirror.
“Helping growth occur through nurturing is truly a powerful and influential role bestowed on women.” Does He really trust us THAT MUCH!?!? WOW! I guess I better live up to it.
ps—I’m taking suggestions for quick, inexpensive, family filling recipes. Send them to doreenbl@waldsfe.org
Mothers Who Know part 2
Mother who know honor sacred ordinances and covenants.
This is why mothers of children aged 4 and under walk the halls during sacrament meeting ~smile~. How many of us sit in the lobby with a crying baby and think “Why do I even bother?” Well we bother because we know the importance of partaking of the sacrament.
We are also mothers who hold temple recommends who for years never get to use it because of pregnancy or nursing babies. My goal is to at least use my recommend once a year while raising children. BUT I had a recommend and it means something to me.
Now that my children are older I try to get to the temple once a month. We try to piggy back it with a stake dance, but life happens.
“These mothers have made and honor temple covenants.”
WOW! About 10 years ago a very good friend of mine forgot this and got herself into some serious trouble. Her trouble was so much that it ended in breaking what once was an eternal marriage into pieces. She forgot to honor her temple covenants. She let the world creep in and tell her other things. It was very sad to watch children pulled apart and worse to see her loose that shine and sparkle that once was with her.
“They know that if they are not pointing their children to the temple, they are not pointing them toward desired eternal goals.”
As I have raised my boys this has been my goal. I didn’t say it in these words, but this has been my goal. I will honestly tell you, this has been so very hard! Working against the world is so very hard. I feel like I’m pushing against a train as it comes screaming down the track, but I’m told of promises and blessings. I have to hold to that idea or I will walk away. Just this morning I wanted to just kick them all out. Complain, complain, complain! But that isn’t my goal and it is a selfish desire.
“These mothers have influence and power.”
What great power we have. What great influence we have. We have power to become like the stripling warriors’ mothers. We have power to move armies, educate armies and create the next generation. And unfortunately Satan knows this too so he works hard on us to make us think just the opposite of this. “I can’t make a difference.” WRONG! You can and you must.
This is why mothers of children aged 4 and under walk the halls during sacrament meeting ~smile~. How many of us sit in the lobby with a crying baby and think “Why do I even bother?” Well we bother because we know the importance of partaking of the sacrament.
We are also mothers who hold temple recommends who for years never get to use it because of pregnancy or nursing babies. My goal is to at least use my recommend once a year while raising children. BUT I had a recommend and it means something to me.
Now that my children are older I try to get to the temple once a month. We try to piggy back it with a stake dance, but life happens.
“These mothers have made and honor temple covenants.”
WOW! About 10 years ago a very good friend of mine forgot this and got herself into some serious trouble. Her trouble was so much that it ended in breaking what once was an eternal marriage into pieces. She forgot to honor her temple covenants. She let the world creep in and tell her other things. It was very sad to watch children pulled apart and worse to see her loose that shine and sparkle that once was with her.
“They know that if they are not pointing their children to the temple, they are not pointing them toward desired eternal goals.”
As I have raised my boys this has been my goal. I didn’t say it in these words, but this has been my goal. I will honestly tell you, this has been so very hard! Working against the world is so very hard. I feel like I’m pushing against a train as it comes screaming down the track, but I’m told of promises and blessings. I have to hold to that idea or I will walk away. Just this morning I wanted to just kick them all out. Complain, complain, complain! But that isn’t my goal and it is a selfish desire.
“These mothers have influence and power.”
What great power we have. What great influence we have. We have power to become like the stripling warriors’ mothers. We have power to move armies, educate armies and create the next generation. And unfortunately Satan knows this too so he works hard on us to make us think just the opposite of this. “I can’t make a difference.” WRONG! You can and you must.
Mother Who Know part 1
My thoughts on Sister Beck's talk "Mother Who Know"
WOW!
What a message to the mothers of the church.
What a message to the women of the church.
What a message to the population of the church.
This is similar to the talk that President Benson gave us back in the 1987 “To the Mothers in Zion” http://fc.byu.edu/jpages/ee/w_etb87.htm I need to reread that talk again and meld the two of these talks together. But we need to discuss sister Beck’s words.
Mothers who know bear children.
As a mother who had fertility we are NEVER to judge other mothers by the number of children they have or don’t have. We are to celebrate each child and its birth. We are to “desire” children. When I was struggling to conceive I desired children like no one else. As my nephew and his wife are contemplating their family they seriously have to think about her health as baring children literally will kill her. She spends 8 months on drugs to keep her and the baby alive. They have one healthy child and just buried an infant. We are NEVER to judge their decision to have a small family. Now that I’m off my soapbox, we need to think about this eternally.
Our heart will be judged. How we value the children we have. How we raise the children we have. How do we value and raise the children that are placed in our stewardship, those placed in our home and those placed in our classes, teams and those that walk through the doors of our home. That is how we will be judged.
“… the value women place on motherhood in this life and the attributes of motherhood they attain here will rise with them in the Resurrection.”
May I only be worthy to live with those children I bore and raised. May I never judge another women her decision to bear and raise children.
WOW!
What a message to the mothers of the church.
What a message to the women of the church.
What a message to the population of the church.
This is similar to the talk that President Benson gave us back in the 1987 “To the Mothers in Zion” http://fc.byu.edu/jpages/ee/w_etb87.htm I need to reread that talk again and meld the two of these talks together. But we need to discuss sister Beck’s words.
Mothers who know bear children.
As a mother who had fertility we are NEVER to judge other mothers by the number of children they have or don’t have. We are to celebrate each child and its birth. We are to “desire” children. When I was struggling to conceive I desired children like no one else. As my nephew and his wife are contemplating their family they seriously have to think about her health as baring children literally will kill her. She spends 8 months on drugs to keep her and the baby alive. They have one healthy child and just buried an infant. We are NEVER to judge their decision to have a small family. Now that I’m off my soapbox, we need to think about this eternally.
Our heart will be judged. How we value the children we have. How we raise the children we have. How do we value and raise the children that are placed in our stewardship, those placed in our home and those placed in our classes, teams and those that walk through the doors of our home. That is how we will be judged.
“… the value women place on motherhood in this life and the attributes of motherhood they attain here will rise with them in the Resurrection.”
May I only be worthy to live with those children I bore and raised. May I never judge another women her decision to bear and raise children.
Small and Simple Things
My thoughts on Elder Christoffel Golden, Jr. talk "Small and Simple Things"
This talk was perfect to follow Sister’s Beck talk. She talked about pulling back and getting back to the basics in life and Elder Golden, Jr. told us what those basic things were. Reading the Book of Mormon.
“Everyone who will live the gospel of Jesus Christ daily and endure to the end will gain eternal life—this is the promise of the Lord. In its essentials, the gospel is simple and easy to understand and adapted to the capacity of the weakest. Alma, the Book of Mormon prophet, aptly remarked, “now ye may supposed that this is foolishness in me; but … by small and simple things are great things brought to pass; … and by very small means the Lord doth confound the wise and bringeth about the salvation of may souls.”
This is motherhood’s key! Sister we have to live by the small and simple things we are taught in the Book of Mormon.
I was just reading 2 Nephi 18 and it talked about how the wicked people in Judah (this is an Isaiah verse) were turning to those who have familiar spirits or unto wizards for help and understanding. How wrong is that. We need to seek help from the Lord and if he directs us outside the standard works then follow, but first get your life back in accordance with the gospel. When we have done that then those who have written self-help books will help us.
I have noticed that in my own life that when life starts falling in around me, it is the small and simple things that lift me out. It is opening up the book of Mormon and reading. It is going to church with a contrite spirit and humbling myself before the Lord.
I echo Elder Golden, Jr. words:“Brothers and sisters, may we discover anew the divine power of daily prayer and the convincing influence of the Book of Mormon and the holy Scriptures.”
This talk was perfect to follow Sister’s Beck talk. She talked about pulling back and getting back to the basics in life and Elder Golden, Jr. told us what those basic things were. Reading the Book of Mormon.
“Everyone who will live the gospel of Jesus Christ daily and endure to the end will gain eternal life—this is the promise of the Lord. In its essentials, the gospel is simple and easy to understand and adapted to the capacity of the weakest. Alma, the Book of Mormon prophet, aptly remarked, “now ye may supposed that this is foolishness in me; but … by small and simple things are great things brought to pass; … and by very small means the Lord doth confound the wise and bringeth about the salvation of may souls.”
This is motherhood’s key! Sister we have to live by the small and simple things we are taught in the Book of Mormon.
I was just reading 2 Nephi 18 and it talked about how the wicked people in Judah (this is an Isaiah verse) were turning to those who have familiar spirits or unto wizards for help and understanding. How wrong is that. We need to seek help from the Lord and if he directs us outside the standard works then follow, but first get your life back in accordance with the gospel. When we have done that then those who have written self-help books will help us.
I have noticed that in my own life that when life starts falling in around me, it is the small and simple things that lift me out. It is opening up the book of Mormon and reading. It is going to church with a contrite spirit and humbling myself before the Lord.
I echo Elder Golden, Jr. words:“Brothers and sisters, may we discover anew the divine power of daily prayer and the convincing influence of the Book of Mormon and the holy Scriptures.”
Friday, February 22, 2008
Don't Leave for Tomorrow What You Can Do Today
My thoughts on Elder Costa's talk "Don't Leave for Tomorrow What You Can Do Today"
“Many parents argue they don’t have time for their families.”
My question is then: WHY HAVE THEM!?!?!?? I’ve never understood that. I truly have not.
What do we teach? (well it is simple if you read D&C 88 (start around 70 and go to 85ish)
But is great to have the Proclamation to help us. I truly have come to love those words. I haven’t ever memorized it, but phrases and bits and pieces stick in my mind often. I know my kids quote “wholesome recreational activities” almost every Saturday morning when I hand out the work list. (WARNING TO SELF—SATURDAY IS TOMORROW!)
We are doing those three things (family prayer, FHE, personal and family scripture study) and even though I might not admit it I think we are reaping the benefits every now and then. Of course not often enough to suit me, but I am seeing them work.
These three things strengthen our faith and testimony—they can’t but help!
(Ok, is it just me and my homeschooler eyes, but does this talk have a lot of phrases like “in the home we learn”?)
“We can lay down our lives for those we love not by physically dying for them but rather by living for them—giving of our time; always being present in their lives; serving them; being courteous, affectionate, and showing true love for those of our family and to all men—as the Savior taught.”
What a thought!
I can’t talk about the rest of the talk in light of what my family is going through this week. But I can testify that things happen at odd times and you need to be prepared physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally and financially for them to happen. We are just going through our accounts, passwords etc so that if one of isn’t here tomorrow our family and the businesses can continue (or the other one knows how to shut it down). That is physically and financially prepared. The other ways—well, I’m not sure I could ever mentally be prepared for something like that, but I often think, “What if that was the last time I see him? Does he know I love him? What were my last words to him?” That usually prompts and email or phone call. I’m starting to do that to my teens who are becoming less home bound as well. I make sure they know I love them before I go to bed. My mom use to say, “I love you” all the time. I thought it really weird, but now….
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Live by Faith and Not by Fear
My thoughts on Elder Cook's talk "Live by Faith and Not by Fear"
I love the image of a wise man raising his arms up to find fresh water. Are there not wise men all around us with their aims raised in the work of the gospel pointing us to not just fresh water but Living Water?
I can testify that we may not like a gospel principle but when we live it fully we in turn gain a testimony of it. Most any young person can test that principle on tithing. I watched that time and time again when I was a young girl and am right now testing it out.
What great council:
1. Follow the prophet.
2. Create the true spirit of the gospel in our hearts and homes.
3. Be a light to those among whom we live.
4. Focus on the ordinances and principles taught in the temple.
I think that about covers it. Although I would add one more: love one another. Maybe I need that one added after the week I’ve lived through.
Missionary work. I’ve always received a pang in my heart when they talk about missionary work because I really don’t associate with many non members. I don’t belong to PTSA, or another other community group where I’m interacting with non-member adults. I was quite troubled by this some time back and had this little piece of personal revelation. My missionary work is not to convert others at this moment in time. My missionary work it to prepare 5, maybe6, missionaries to serve worthily when they are 19 (or 21). When that is done, then I may look towards other things. Once that revelation was given to me, I relaxed and was able to see that my example speaks when I’m around the few non-member adults I come in contact with. I now no longer fear this command, but understand my part in it and can love it now.
To fulfill that revelation we are going to use “Preach my Gospel” when we are finished with the Book of Mormon as our scriptures as I have a 16 year old to prepare for a mission (and four others who will follow in all too quick a fashion).
Many times I do obey out of fear, but once you live the principle or command, that fear is quickly replaced with love. You then have no problem following because you love the Lord and love his gospel.
I love the image of a wise man raising his arms up to find fresh water. Are there not wise men all around us with their aims raised in the work of the gospel pointing us to not just fresh water but Living Water?
I can testify that we may not like a gospel principle but when we live it fully we in turn gain a testimony of it. Most any young person can test that principle on tithing. I watched that time and time again when I was a young girl and am right now testing it out.
What great council:
1. Follow the prophet.
2. Create the true spirit of the gospel in our hearts and homes.
3. Be a light to those among whom we live.
4. Focus on the ordinances and principles taught in the temple.
I think that about covers it. Although I would add one more: love one another. Maybe I need that one added after the week I’ve lived through.
Missionary work. I’ve always received a pang in my heart when they talk about missionary work because I really don’t associate with many non members. I don’t belong to PTSA, or another other community group where I’m interacting with non-member adults. I was quite troubled by this some time back and had this little piece of personal revelation. My missionary work is not to convert others at this moment in time. My missionary work it to prepare 5, maybe6, missionaries to serve worthily when they are 19 (or 21). When that is done, then I may look towards other things. Once that revelation was given to me, I relaxed and was able to see that my example speaks when I’m around the few non-member adults I come in contact with. I now no longer fear this command, but understand my part in it and can love it now.
To fulfill that revelation we are going to use “Preach my Gospel” when we are finished with the Book of Mormon as our scriptures as I have a 16 year old to prepare for a mission (and four others who will follow in all too quick a fashion).
Many times I do obey out of fear, but once you live the principle or command, that fear is quickly replaced with love. You then have no problem following because you love the Lord and love his gospel.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
O Remember, Remember
My thougths on Pres. Eyring's talk "O Remember, Remember"
I have taken journaling seriously since I got my first journal back in 3rd grade. You know the kind: the kind with a little key to lock it. Now that we are smiling, I really took it seriously that I was to put down my feelings. I didn’t know what else to put down, so I put down things that I wanted to know about my grandmother who had passed away before I was born. Of course at 8, I wanted to know what books she was reading, what homework she hated and what boy she had a crush on so I wrote those things down. I still have all my journals (don’t tell anyone about them yet, because I haven’t edited them) and I read them every now and then. About the time we move I pull the box out and see what shape they are in. If they fall open to an interesting time I can spend a good two or three hours captured in their pages. My journal writing took a turn for the better about the time I turned 16. Not that the antics were any better, after all I was a teen, but the words and feelings were much different. I have continued writing faithfully even today when my life is full to the max with six children, homeschooling and all the responsibilities that come with those two careers. Sometimes it is just a simple entry just once a month and often it sounds more like a travel log, but it is recording my history and now that of my family. I keep a few blogs (one with all my posts to this group) that also are a journal of sorts.
My husband is in the process of transcribing and editing his mission journals as our oldest son is now 16. He is putting them together in a book (will be using Heritage Makers to publish it) for each of the boys. He was the first of his family to go on a mission (his family found the church when he was 7) and really wished someone would have told him what a mission really is like. (That sounds odd, but it really does make sense.) Anyway, as he has been rereading his journal I hear all sorts of editorial comments as he is typing. Sometimes it is uncontrollable laughter and other times it is a sigh. Often it is “Oh, I wonder how that family is doing?”
Remembering is good for the soul. Remember the pain as well as the happiness is good for us. Remembering the sad as well as the happy help us grow and cheer each other on. But mostly remembering helps us see our progress (or lack thereof) and move forward with faith and determination to do better.
I’m thankful for the journals my fore-parents kept. The heritage and legacy they left me are something I try to strive to live worthy of daily. I’m thankful they kept a journal so that I could know of their faith and trials. I’m thankful they persevered when the chips were down. My life isn’t nearly as trying as there, and I have no need or right to complain in comparison. Reading their stories make me strive to be a better person. I truly am blessed with faithful ancestors.
They have helped me do two things that Pres. Eyring talks about.
“More than gratitude began to grow in my heart. Testimony grew.”
Reading what they wrote gives me gratitude for their trials and for mine. My testimony grows when I read how the Lord blessed them (or cursed them when they sinned). Even reading my own journals leads to these two things. Gratitude and Testimony!
Since I write my journal on the computer now (you can’t read my handwriting!) I will print out the two questions he asks at the end of the talk and make mention of them daily (or as often as I write).
1. Did God send a message that was just for me?
2. Did I see His hand in my life or the lives of my children?
And I will make sure that when my children read my journal they will know that I had (or have) a testimony of the gospel and I’m grateful to be their mother and a Child of God!
I have taken journaling seriously since I got my first journal back in 3rd grade. You know the kind: the kind with a little key to lock it. Now that we are smiling, I really took it seriously that I was to put down my feelings. I didn’t know what else to put down, so I put down things that I wanted to know about my grandmother who had passed away before I was born. Of course at 8, I wanted to know what books she was reading, what homework she hated and what boy she had a crush on so I wrote those things down. I still have all my journals (don’t tell anyone about them yet, because I haven’t edited them) and I read them every now and then. About the time we move I pull the box out and see what shape they are in. If they fall open to an interesting time I can spend a good two or three hours captured in their pages. My journal writing took a turn for the better about the time I turned 16. Not that the antics were any better, after all I was a teen, but the words and feelings were much different. I have continued writing faithfully even today when my life is full to the max with six children, homeschooling and all the responsibilities that come with those two careers. Sometimes it is just a simple entry just once a month and often it sounds more like a travel log, but it is recording my history and now that of my family. I keep a few blogs (one with all my posts to this group) that also are a journal of sorts.
My husband is in the process of transcribing and editing his mission journals as our oldest son is now 16. He is putting them together in a book (will be using Heritage Makers to publish it) for each of the boys. He was the first of his family to go on a mission (his family found the church when he was 7) and really wished someone would have told him what a mission really is like. (That sounds odd, but it really does make sense.) Anyway, as he has been rereading his journal I hear all sorts of editorial comments as he is typing. Sometimes it is uncontrollable laughter and other times it is a sigh. Often it is “Oh, I wonder how that family is doing?”
Remembering is good for the soul. Remember the pain as well as the happiness is good for us. Remembering the sad as well as the happy help us grow and cheer each other on. But mostly remembering helps us see our progress (or lack thereof) and move forward with faith and determination to do better.
I’m thankful for the journals my fore-parents kept. The heritage and legacy they left me are something I try to strive to live worthy of daily. I’m thankful they kept a journal so that I could know of their faith and trials. I’m thankful they persevered when the chips were down. My life isn’t nearly as trying as there, and I have no need or right to complain in comparison. Reading their stories make me strive to be a better person. I truly am blessed with faithful ancestors.
They have helped me do two things that Pres. Eyring talks about.
“More than gratitude began to grow in my heart. Testimony grew.”
Reading what they wrote gives me gratitude for their trials and for mine. My testimony grows when I read how the Lord blessed them (or cursed them when they sinned). Even reading my own journals leads to these two things. Gratitude and Testimony!
Since I write my journal on the computer now (you can’t read my handwriting!) I will print out the two questions he asks at the end of the talk and make mention of them daily (or as often as I write).
1. Did God send a message that was just for me?
2. Did I see His hand in my life or the lives of my children?
And I will make sure that when my children read my journal they will know that I had (or have) a testimony of the gospel and I’m grateful to be their mother and a Child of God!
Slow to Anger
My thoughts on President Hinckley's talk "Slow to Anger"
Slow to Anger is so not Doreen!!!
I need to, no I have to change! I really do!!! I grew up in a house where things were kept bottled up until blow up time. I don’t even keep them bottled up very long and I just explode. This is so very wrong and I need so much to repent and change my ways. I truly wish I could have seen this talk. I wish I could have seen Pres. Hinckley’s face. This is his last address to the Priesthood Brethren. And yet, I’m the one in our family who needs it. My husband has the patience of Job with me.
I just read Pres. Benson’s talk “Beware of Pride” for a lesson I’m teaching on 2 Nephi 16-18 and it went hand in hand with this talk. I think maybe I need to read both talks each week for the next little bit until they become engrained in my brain and in my heart.
I don’t know much about divorce or statistics, but I believe it when he says that divorce is often the bitter fruit of anger. If you add Pres. Benson’s Pride talk, you have probably the reason for most of the divorces in the world: Pride and Anger. I know those two things contributed to my parents’ divorce. (All the children had left the home when they divorced.) Pride and Anger make us do stupid and sometimes damning things.
“… little inconsequential activities lead to criticism. Little flaws are magnified into great torrents of faultfinding; they fall apart, they separate, and then with rancor and bitterness they divorce.”
Some of us don’t let it get that far, but how many of us are at the “great torrents of faultfinding”?
“So many of us make a great fuss of matters of small consequence. We are so easily offended. Happy is the man who can brush aside the offending remarks of another and go on his way.”
Didn’t Elder Bednar speak about offences?
I have a son who makes mountains out of ant hills. It is so frustrating to be around him. I wonder how my husband puts up with me, as this son is so much like me.
We then hold grudges. How many times do we get to a point where we can’t even remember why we are angry, we just continue down the path we are on because it is easier than repenting and moving to a different path.
I need to adopt the gentleman’s rule about quarrels. “’When my wife and I were married we determined that if we ever got in a quarrel one of us would leave the house. I attribute my longevity to the fact that I have breathed good fresh air throughout my married life.”
Most of the time, I have found that time and distance helps me diffuse the situation and let the anger I feel dissipate.
I will have to take his challenge:“I plead with you to control your tempers, to put a smile upon your faces, which will erase anger; speak out with words of love and peace, appreciation and respect. If you will do this your lives will be without regret. Your marriages and family relationships will be preserved. You will be much happier. You will do greater good. You will feel a sense of peace that will be wonderful.”
And who better to say these words than a man who was faithful, completely faithful, to his family for 67 years! Who loved his wife like few men do, a man who knows how to control anger, have humor, have faith, have fun and have love in his life for so long. Unlike many we can’t say, “Physician heal thyself.” Oh, no! We just “Follow him!”
Slow to Anger is so not Doreen!!!
I need to, no I have to change! I really do!!! I grew up in a house where things were kept bottled up until blow up time. I don’t even keep them bottled up very long and I just explode. This is so very wrong and I need so much to repent and change my ways. I truly wish I could have seen this talk. I wish I could have seen Pres. Hinckley’s face. This is his last address to the Priesthood Brethren. And yet, I’m the one in our family who needs it. My husband has the patience of Job with me.
I just read Pres. Benson’s talk “Beware of Pride” for a lesson I’m teaching on 2 Nephi 16-18 and it went hand in hand with this talk. I think maybe I need to read both talks each week for the next little bit until they become engrained in my brain and in my heart.
I don’t know much about divorce or statistics, but I believe it when he says that divorce is often the bitter fruit of anger. If you add Pres. Benson’s Pride talk, you have probably the reason for most of the divorces in the world: Pride and Anger. I know those two things contributed to my parents’ divorce. (All the children had left the home when they divorced.) Pride and Anger make us do stupid and sometimes damning things.
“… little inconsequential activities lead to criticism. Little flaws are magnified into great torrents of faultfinding; they fall apart, they separate, and then with rancor and bitterness they divorce.”
Some of us don’t let it get that far, but how many of us are at the “great torrents of faultfinding”?
“So many of us make a great fuss of matters of small consequence. We are so easily offended. Happy is the man who can brush aside the offending remarks of another and go on his way.”
Didn’t Elder Bednar speak about offences?
I have a son who makes mountains out of ant hills. It is so frustrating to be around him. I wonder how my husband puts up with me, as this son is so much like me.
We then hold grudges. How many times do we get to a point where we can’t even remember why we are angry, we just continue down the path we are on because it is easier than repenting and moving to a different path.
I need to adopt the gentleman’s rule about quarrels. “’When my wife and I were married we determined that if we ever got in a quarrel one of us would leave the house. I attribute my longevity to the fact that I have breathed good fresh air throughout my married life.”
Most of the time, I have found that time and distance helps me diffuse the situation and let the anger I feel dissipate.
I will have to take his challenge:“I plead with you to control your tempers, to put a smile upon your faces, which will erase anger; speak out with words of love and peace, appreciation and respect. If you will do this your lives will be without regret. Your marriages and family relationships will be preserved. You will be much happier. You will do greater good. You will feel a sense of peace that will be wonderful.”
And who better to say these words than a man who was faithful, completely faithful, to his family for 67 years! Who loved his wife like few men do, a man who knows how to control anger, have humor, have faith, have fun and have love in his life for so long. Unlike many we can’t say, “Physician heal thyself.” Oh, no! We just “Follow him!”
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
A Royal Priesthood
My thoughts on President Monson's talk "A Royal Priesthood"
I wasn’t sure how I would take to President Monson as our new prophet. I didn’t doubt his being the new prophet, well I guess technically he has been a prophet for a long time, but THE Prophet or President? Well, I wasn’t sure. Last Sunday when I heard of President Hinckley’s passing I wasn’t shocked, no, I was saddened at our lost. I was happy for his reunion with the Savior and his beloved Marjorie and many others of his family as well as past prophets that no doubt stood in line to hug him as they welcomed him home.
But in all honestly as I thought about the secession of the prophets I hesitated just a moment when I thought about President Monson as President, Prophet and all for our church. The hesitation was just a moment, kind of a double take when you aren’t quite sure what you just saw. I then remembered that during sacrament that afternoon I had read his talk he gave to the priesthood brethren. I didn’t question his calling.
It was confirmed again the moment he stood up to conduct President Hinckley’s funeral (boy did he look old that day) and then when he spoke, I had a wave of confirmation come over me.
My children and I listened to the press conference on Monday when they announced the first presidency. (He looked young again.) We missed the first 5 minutes (technical difficulties) but we heard him answer questions from the media and again that wave came rushing over me. I could love him as THE prophet and president. Not that President Kimball, Benson, Hunter, Hinckley will be pushed out as they all have a place in my heart (Lee would too, but I was way too young when he passed to really remember him), but there is room in my heart for Pres. Monson too. It is kind of like adding more children to your family. No one is replaced; the heart just gets enlarged for more.
He talks about MARKS. As I work out in the gym every morning I notice marks on people. Marks as tattoos as well as scars. I think of the marks on me. I can tell you how almost every scar came about. The one where I took a knife and stabbed myself, not on purpose, but through careless actions. The stretch marks from baring children. The marks of worry around my eyes. I wrote a poem about these marks.
Life Line
dedicated to my children
What are those lines I see
Staring so faintly back at me?
Lines around my clear blue eyes,
From worries of the days gone by.
Lines around the mouth I fear,
From smiling, giggling from ear to ear.
Lines on knuckles snarled with scars,
From driving with our teens in cars.
Lines in places not many view,
From babies that were long ov'r due.
Lines of love, joy, worries and fears,
Because I've loved you all these years.
These are marks of a mother’s love. The marks Pres. Monson talk of are also marks of love, love for the Savior who we represent, some by holding priesthood and all by the waters of baptism.
The mark of vision. Do we really see what we can become? Do we really see us how the Lord sees us? Do we see us as others see us?
The mark of effort. “… we may find that there are times in our lives when we falter, when we become weary or fatigued, or when we suffer a disappointment or a heartache. When that happens, I would hope that we will persevere with even greater effort toward our goal.” How many of us just go through the motions sometimes because we know the blessings that come? How many of us just “do it” because? How many of us “do it” with a bit more in the hope that we will “catch it.” I love how Pres. Monson tells us all that we will all hold a calling where we need to show forth effort. It is all about effort!
The mark of faith. Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ is the first principle of the gospel. I love this sentence, “Friendships, we know, may alter and change, but the Lord is constant.” He echoed those words in yesterday’s press conference. To paraphrase, the classes and other things may change but the gospel is constant.
The mark of virtue. If you have the above marks then this mark just follows. It isn’t hard to keep when you are committed to the gospel of Jesus Christ.
The mark of prayer. Even if you are totally committed, sometimes we let this one slip a bit. I often think my prayers are bouncing off the ceiling. My mom use to tell me then go pray outside. I chuckled when she said that, but there was some comfort in her words. He hasn’t moved, we need to move. He is listening, always; are we talking. He is speaking, always; are we listening.
What kind of marks are you going to have on your person? Are they marks of love or foolishness?
I wasn’t sure how I would take to President Monson as our new prophet. I didn’t doubt his being the new prophet, well I guess technically he has been a prophet for a long time, but THE Prophet or President? Well, I wasn’t sure. Last Sunday when I heard of President Hinckley’s passing I wasn’t shocked, no, I was saddened at our lost. I was happy for his reunion with the Savior and his beloved Marjorie and many others of his family as well as past prophets that no doubt stood in line to hug him as they welcomed him home.
But in all honestly as I thought about the secession of the prophets I hesitated just a moment when I thought about President Monson as President, Prophet and all for our church. The hesitation was just a moment, kind of a double take when you aren’t quite sure what you just saw. I then remembered that during sacrament that afternoon I had read his talk he gave to the priesthood brethren. I didn’t question his calling.
It was confirmed again the moment he stood up to conduct President Hinckley’s funeral (boy did he look old that day) and then when he spoke, I had a wave of confirmation come over me.
My children and I listened to the press conference on Monday when they announced the first presidency. (He looked young again.) We missed the first 5 minutes (technical difficulties) but we heard him answer questions from the media and again that wave came rushing over me. I could love him as THE prophet and president. Not that President Kimball, Benson, Hunter, Hinckley will be pushed out as they all have a place in my heart (Lee would too, but I was way too young when he passed to really remember him), but there is room in my heart for Pres. Monson too. It is kind of like adding more children to your family. No one is replaced; the heart just gets enlarged for more.
He talks about MARKS. As I work out in the gym every morning I notice marks on people. Marks as tattoos as well as scars. I think of the marks on me. I can tell you how almost every scar came about. The one where I took a knife and stabbed myself, not on purpose, but through careless actions. The stretch marks from baring children. The marks of worry around my eyes. I wrote a poem about these marks.
Life Line
dedicated to my children
What are those lines I see
Staring so faintly back at me?
Lines around my clear blue eyes,
From worries of the days gone by.
Lines around the mouth I fear,
From smiling, giggling from ear to ear.
Lines on knuckles snarled with scars,
From driving with our teens in cars.
Lines in places not many view,
From babies that were long ov'r due.
Lines of love, joy, worries and fears,
Because I've loved you all these years.
These are marks of a mother’s love. The marks Pres. Monson talk of are also marks of love, love for the Savior who we represent, some by holding priesthood and all by the waters of baptism.
The mark of vision. Do we really see what we can become? Do we really see us how the Lord sees us? Do we see us as others see us?
The mark of effort. “… we may find that there are times in our lives when we falter, when we become weary or fatigued, or when we suffer a disappointment or a heartache. When that happens, I would hope that we will persevere with even greater effort toward our goal.” How many of us just go through the motions sometimes because we know the blessings that come? How many of us just “do it” because? How many of us “do it” with a bit more in the hope that we will “catch it.” I love how Pres. Monson tells us all that we will all hold a calling where we need to show forth effort. It is all about effort!
The mark of faith. Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ is the first principle of the gospel. I love this sentence, “Friendships, we know, may alter and change, but the Lord is constant.” He echoed those words in yesterday’s press conference. To paraphrase, the classes and other things may change but the gospel is constant.
The mark of virtue. If you have the above marks then this mark just follows. It isn’t hard to keep when you are committed to the gospel of Jesus Christ.
The mark of prayer. Even if you are totally committed, sometimes we let this one slip a bit. I often think my prayers are bouncing off the ceiling. My mom use to tell me then go pray outside. I chuckled when she said that, but there was some comfort in her words. He hasn’t moved, we need to move. He is listening, always; are we talking. He is speaking, always; are we listening.
What kind of marks are you going to have on your person? Are they marks of love or foolishness?
God Helps the Faithful Priesthood Holder
My thoughts on President Eyring's "God Helps the Faithful Priesthood Holder"
I’m beginning to love Elder Eyring more and more as he speaks. Yesterday watching the new first presidency in a press conference was very interesting. I watched Pres. Eyring and Uchdorf (I’ve got to learn how to really spell his name now and both of their names get a red squiggly on my computer) nod their heads in agreement with Pres. Monson the whole time.
As a mom to five boys I read this article with particular interest. I’m not sure it was this article I read or if there was one similar last time, but it seems that the prophets are reminding the boys more often about how the Lord loves them and wants them to be strong and stand up for what is right. He will help those priesthood holders who are doing good, staying true and doing their job. I know it is true for the sisters, and God is no respecter of person, but it is refreshing to see it in print, hear it spoken from the pulpit and feel it in my heart.
I heard a few messages that he wants us to take into our lives. The first is that the “the assurance will come from a memory of times Heavenly Father has helped you through dangers and difficulties.” This reminds me of the scripture in the D&C where the Lord tells Oliver, “Did I not speak peace into your heart.” We have memories to learn from, good memories and bad ones. When we are on the path of righteousness those memories will help us through some difficulties because we remember that the Lord loves us and wants us to succeed.
The second part was “…pray for help in facing a hard assignment…” I am hoping that I have taught this well to my children. When they have lost something or find a challenge that they just can’t get over and come to me, one of the first things I ask them is if they have prayed. I’ve noticed that they are now starting the conversations with me like this, “Mom, I’ve already prayed, but I still can’t…..” I chuckle inside. I guess they are listening. The answer Pres. Eyring received was a great one itself. “Forget yourself—start praying about the people you are to serve.” How often do we have selfish prayers? I know of late I have been praying for two of my children who have been struggling and the more I pray for them the more love I feel for them. This happened to me when I was a RS president too. I was praying for sisters who wouldn’t even open the door when I was on their front porch and yet, I loved them. Go figure!
The third part is “go to work!” How often do we wait for the path to be shown? I find in homeschooling that this answer is most often the answer I receive when asking about a particular curriculum, subject or way. Sometimes it isn’t the answer that needs changing but the placement of our feet. My mom use to tell me that the truly prayerful were never led down the wrong path, but those who never moved didn’t go down either path.
Then of course what priesthood leader can give a talk like this without saying something in about being clean. You can not do the above without being clean. “No unclean thing…” “No priesthood holder who wants to succeed will be careless about where his eyes may go.” “The same care is required in what we say.” “You can decide—and you must—to change what you say even when you can’t control what others say.”
This is so hard sometimes, but one must “bridle their tongue.” It is only then that we master the mind, body and spirit.
Monday, February 4, 2008
Today is the Time
My thoughts on Elder Gonzales' talk "Today is the Time"
He asks a question that I thought he gave the wrong answer to. “What motivated these leaders to go out and help others, even to the risking of their own lives? OK, it wasn’t a wrong answer just a different answer. I think that the most correct answer should be, “love.” Maybe it is because I’m a woman, but it isn’t duty that makes me go to the side of a sister when her mother dies, or call to make sure my visiting teaching sisters are OK after a storm in my area. No, it is because I love them.
We recently had a huge storm that dumped tons of water on our state in the matter of minutes. What made the people from our stake and other spend a Saturday working in the worst hit areas. Especially a Saturday before Christmas! It was love for God’s children. Plain and simple! I’m sure the members of the priesthood quorums, presidencies and other church leaders went down their check lists to make sure their members were safe. It was their calling that they accepted and as anyone knows who has either been in a leadership position or had a loved one in such a position, your love for those you serve makes doing the duty second nature.
Ok, he is correct when he says, “Gospel principles engraved in their lives” and that principle is “love one another.”
He talks about preparedness. In our stake we have a day set aside where we pretend something has gone wrong and we go through the motions of that emergency. We have had earthquakes, snow storms, avian flu outbreaks and we have had real drills when the power went out for 6-10 days. I find it interesting that we have these drills in September just before our winter weather. It is a chance for us to prepare so that when such emergencies happen we are prepared.
As with physically being prepared we also need to be spiritually prepared for those emergencies. Just as we walked through what we needed to do in our mock emergencies, we need to walk through what will happen when we come upon spiritual emergencies. Just as we gather food, supplies, blankets, flashlights, fuel, etc for the physical emergencies, we need to gather and prepare for the spiritual emergencies by doing the simple things: scripture study, prayer, temple worship, Sunday meetings, etc.
This is a principle that needs not only be taught through lessons, but also through modeling. Just recently my oldest son happened upon my blogs (I have five) and my list of articles I have written for LDS NHA. He was shocked at how much writing I have done and how much I do. I guess I hadn’t done a great job in modeling the behavior of writing.
Two weeks ago I took my van into the garage because the check engine light came on. While we were waiting we were looking at cars (he is 16 need I say more?). He desperately wanted to have a conversation with the car salesman about how much it would cost to buy a car. It took him about 45 minutes of walking around before he came to me and said, “Mom, I just don’t know what to say.” It hit me, that he had never had this modeled for him and therefore he didn’t know what to do. What a great life lesson I had the chance to teach him that day.
If we do not model spiritual behaviors how will our children know how to act when they are put in a position where they need to move and act. As Elder Gonzalez says, “today is the time” to teach our children through our actions, words and lessons.
We can not take it for granted that our children will learn just because we told them. We need to model good righteous behavior.
This reminds me of an article I read many moons ago about a doctor who came from the “projects.” He and his brother came from very humble beginnings. Their mother worked long hard hours and sacrificed much. If I have the story right she was a very young single mother. Her sons recall with fondness how when they were in the street playing their mother was on the front porch reading. She was reading such books as Shakespeare, Homer and other “hard books.” One day, long after the brothers were in medical school, they gave their mother a collection of leather bound books for Christmas. She broke into tears. The boys thought that was because she loved the books so much. No, she told them. It was because she didn’t know how to read. She had been modeling the behavior so her boys would think she knew how to read. She had been fooling them the whole time just so they would have a better chance in life. She had a neighbor help her read their letters and anything else that she needed. Her boys sat down and started to teach her to read. Then end of the story was that she had just finished the last book in the collection.
I often think about that mother when I model a good behavior that I don’t necessarily like to do. I think of the example I’m setting for my children.
He asks a question that I thought he gave the wrong answer to. “What motivated these leaders to go out and help others, even to the risking of their own lives? OK, it wasn’t a wrong answer just a different answer. I think that the most correct answer should be, “love.” Maybe it is because I’m a woman, but it isn’t duty that makes me go to the side of a sister when her mother dies, or call to make sure my visiting teaching sisters are OK after a storm in my area. No, it is because I love them.
We recently had a huge storm that dumped tons of water on our state in the matter of minutes. What made the people from our stake and other spend a Saturday working in the worst hit areas. Especially a Saturday before Christmas! It was love for God’s children. Plain and simple! I’m sure the members of the priesthood quorums, presidencies and other church leaders went down their check lists to make sure their members were safe. It was their calling that they accepted and as anyone knows who has either been in a leadership position or had a loved one in such a position, your love for those you serve makes doing the duty second nature.
Ok, he is correct when he says, “Gospel principles engraved in their lives” and that principle is “love one another.”
He talks about preparedness. In our stake we have a day set aside where we pretend something has gone wrong and we go through the motions of that emergency. We have had earthquakes, snow storms, avian flu outbreaks and we have had real drills when the power went out for 6-10 days. I find it interesting that we have these drills in September just before our winter weather. It is a chance for us to prepare so that when such emergencies happen we are prepared.
As with physically being prepared we also need to be spiritually prepared for those emergencies. Just as we walked through what we needed to do in our mock emergencies, we need to walk through what will happen when we come upon spiritual emergencies. Just as we gather food, supplies, blankets, flashlights, fuel, etc for the physical emergencies, we need to gather and prepare for the spiritual emergencies by doing the simple things: scripture study, prayer, temple worship, Sunday meetings, etc.
This is a principle that needs not only be taught through lessons, but also through modeling. Just recently my oldest son happened upon my blogs (I have five) and my list of articles I have written for LDS NHA. He was shocked at how much writing I have done and how much I do. I guess I hadn’t done a great job in modeling the behavior of writing.
Two weeks ago I took my van into the garage because the check engine light came on. While we were waiting we were looking at cars (he is 16 need I say more?). He desperately wanted to have a conversation with the car salesman about how much it would cost to buy a car. It took him about 45 minutes of walking around before he came to me and said, “Mom, I just don’t know what to say.” It hit me, that he had never had this modeled for him and therefore he didn’t know what to do. What a great life lesson I had the chance to teach him that day.
If we do not model spiritual behaviors how will our children know how to act when they are put in a position where they need to move and act. As Elder Gonzalez says, “today is the time” to teach our children through our actions, words and lessons.
We can not take it for granted that our children will learn just because we told them. We need to model good righteous behavior.
This reminds me of an article I read many moons ago about a doctor who came from the “projects.” He and his brother came from very humble beginnings. Their mother worked long hard hours and sacrificed much. If I have the story right she was a very young single mother. Her sons recall with fondness how when they were in the street playing their mother was on the front porch reading. She was reading such books as Shakespeare, Homer and other “hard books.” One day, long after the brothers were in medical school, they gave their mother a collection of leather bound books for Christmas. She broke into tears. The boys thought that was because she loved the books so much. No, she told them. It was because she didn’t know how to read. She had been modeling the behavior so her boys would think she knew how to read. She had been fooling them the whole time just so they would have a better chance in life. She had a neighbor help her read their letters and anything else that she needed. Her boys sat down and started to teach her to read. Then end of the story was that she had just finished the last book in the collection.
I often think about that mother when I model a good behavior that I don’t necessarily like to do. I think of the example I’m setting for my children.
Blessed are the Pure in Heart
My thoughs on Elder Clayton's talk "Blessed Are the Pure in Heart"
You know someone had to speak on this topic during the Priesthood session. It is so important that our children stay away from the evils of immorality and all that comes with it.
This is one of my biggest fears. I’m so afraid my sons will go down this path and get too far before I find it. I have a friend whose son went down this path and has ruined his life. Yes, he has repented, but there are lots of roads that have been blocked. He can’t serve a mission, work with youth, and I wonder how many young women will walk away from this young man. He truly has made a bed that is difficult to lie in. Yes, I believe in repentance and love this young man, but we live in a world where not everyone does and sometimes we live by the laws of the land that require registration. I wish this young man hope for a better tomorrow.
I have openly talked about this situation with my sons and told them it was just a little peek that started this young man down a path that has changed his life FOREVER!
BUT THERE IS HOPE! There is repentance. There is always hope. No matter the sin there is repentance. My only hope is that my family doesn’t have to walk the road to repentance because of pornography.
You know someone had to speak on this topic during the Priesthood session. It is so important that our children stay away from the evils of immorality and all that comes with it.
This is one of my biggest fears. I’m so afraid my sons will go down this path and get too far before I find it. I have a friend whose son went down this path and has ruined his life. Yes, he has repented, but there are lots of roads that have been blocked. He can’t serve a mission, work with youth, and I wonder how many young women will walk away from this young man. He truly has made a bed that is difficult to lie in. Yes, I believe in repentance and love this young man, but we live in a world where not everyone does and sometimes we live by the laws of the land that require registration. I wish this young man hope for a better tomorrow.
I have openly talked about this situation with my sons and told them it was just a little peek that started this young man down a path that has changed his life FOREVER!
BUT THERE IS HOPE! There is repentance. There is always hope. No matter the sin there is repentance. My only hope is that my family doesn’t have to walk the road to repentance because of pornography.
Do It Now
My thoughts on Elder Hallstrom's talk "Do it Now"
What a funny story and how embarrassing! I’m a huge procrastinator and I need to do better. It was one of my goals for the new year and yet, here I am behind on my own group and the projects are piling up on my desk.
When I first saw the title of this talk not having heard it because I don’t go to the Priesthood session, I thought of Pres. Kimball and his sign “Do it!” My brothers, who were teens when President Kimball was the prophet (OK, I was too, but I was in my early teens) had a sticker on our bathroom mirror that said, “Do it!” I don’t know how many Saturdays I would find my list of jobs taped underneath that sign. What a wonderful memory I had!
Easy Street is truly a dead end and yet, ~sign~ I try to take it way too often.
Now is the time to exercise faith and obedience. I need to put my like back on track. I need to stop procrastinating. I need to DO IT NOW!
Then after I model it my children will do it too. I spend a lot of time on the computer and of course my children think that the only reason to be on the computer is to play games so they don’t realize I’m working, reading, studying and all those other good things. Maybe I need to get up and work, move my work station, print off the information I want to read about. Maybe I need to model a “do it now” attitude.
What a funny story and how embarrassing! I’m a huge procrastinator and I need to do better. It was one of my goals for the new year and yet, here I am behind on my own group and the projects are piling up on my desk.
When I first saw the title of this talk not having heard it because I don’t go to the Priesthood session, I thought of Pres. Kimball and his sign “Do it!” My brothers, who were teens when President Kimball was the prophet (OK, I was too, but I was in my early teens) had a sticker on our bathroom mirror that said, “Do it!” I don’t know how many Saturdays I would find my list of jobs taped underneath that sign. What a wonderful memory I had!
Easy Street is truly a dead end and yet, ~sign~ I try to take it way too often.
Now is the time to exercise faith and obedience. I need to put my like back on track. I need to stop procrastinating. I need to DO IT NOW!
Then after I model it my children will do it too. I spend a lot of time on the computer and of course my children think that the only reason to be on the computer is to play games so they don’t realize I’m working, reading, studying and all those other good things. Maybe I need to get up and work, move my work station, print off the information I want to read about. Maybe I need to model a “do it now” attitude.
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Raising the Bar
Elder Perry’s talk “Raising the Bar” is so timely for my family. My eldest just turned 16 and we are in those all important years of major mission prep.
I went through and marked the talk with bullet points. Here is what he said we needed to do:
1. Physical health and strength. “Missionary work is hard, and full-time missionaries must be in good physical condition to serve.” This is one reason my family swims 4 days a week and plays soccer six months out of the year. We also snow ski (and board). We love the outdoors and have learned to put in some hard days working. I want my kids to be the pace setter, not the drag-a-long. I see so many young men (even in the church) who are overweight, and who can’t put in a hard day of work. That is so sad.
2. Physical appearance. One thing I’m grateful that homeschooling allows me is that my kids aren’t into fads. Their hair doesn’t hang in their face (I demand to see their eyes, ears and neck). I also make sure there is good hygiene. They know how to take care of their skin and hair. They know how to press a white shirt (they have to do it often because they never hang them up—we are working on that). I was on jury duty and the first trial I was a potential juror for had the defendant (whom we found out was homeless) dressed in a white shirt and khaki pants. But the shirt and pants still had the lines from the packaging. My first thought was that the attorney should have known how to work an iron and he should have ironed the poor man’s clothing. That attorney also had a tattoo on his hand. I’m not prejudice and I wouldn’t have held either fact against him or his client, but it did make me think twice. For those who have tattoo, I mean no disrespect. I had a home teacher when younger who joined the church later in life and had tattoos, BUT for those who know better, well, I will leave that thought.
3. Intellectual preparation. DUH! How often has the prophets told us not to neglect our minds. We need to be able to converse intelligently with those we come in contact with. It builds bridges and lets people know you have thought these “strange” things through and that your words might have weight behind them. It also helps for when you have a family and have to provide for them.
4. Seminary! I know how hard it is to arise at 5 to make an early morning meeting when you are homeschooled, but it is very important for the young to have this experience. I don’t know how to accurately express my thoughts on this and maybe it is because I love the gospel too much! I even had an awful New Testament class at BYU and I learned so much from it. I learned that even those who are learned don’t know it all. I learned that I had to have my own testimony about the truthfulness of the gospel. I learned that my spiritual development was up to me! I took that class again from a different professor and learned that the gospels weren’t about fire and brimstone, but about love. It was truly a growing experience.
5. Emotional stability. I think this one is going to be hardest for my children. My kids all walk to the beat of a different drummer and I have two in particular that I worry about. I’m trying to help them deal with stress, disappointment and emotions that are crazy because of hormones as well as the Spirit. This is truly one that my family needs to work on.
6. Social skills!!!! My “sheltered, homeschooled, boys” are very, very sheltered and don’t know how to talk to adults! NOT!!!!!!! Far from it. My kids actually enjoy the company of others and will give you a long list of people who are their friends. They are not afraid to talk to an adult, shake their hand and talk directly to their face. My son just had to ask 13 fathers to borrow their wii’s for a mutual activity. He called on the phone, left messages, talked to them face to face and was able to secure 13 of them in about two days! This is where scouts, sports, young men’s and other activities are a must for our young men, especially those who are homeschooled. This is also why I started a teen group in our area.
7. MONEY! You will never have enough money for your wants and most of the time you will have just enough for your needs. It is so important to get your children to help pay for some if not their entire mission. I would rather pay for their schooling than their mission. They then have a vested interested in their mission. It will mean something to them. My sons put 30% of their increase into a mission fund.
8. Personal worthiness. This is one so very important. It doesn’t matter if you have all the other 8 points together; if you can’t cut the mustard in the worthy category then you better not pack your bags until you can. I love how the Lord will let us repent and our youth need to know that!
We plan on using “Preach My Gospel” as our family scripture study as soon as we are done with the Book of Mormon. Have any of you used it?
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