Part 4

My thoughts on Sister Beck's talk "What Latter-day Saint Women Do Best: Stand Strong and Immovable"

Leaders:
This is so near and dear to my heart. I’ve been called a natural leader. I’m someone who sees a hole and will fill it. I see a need for something to be done and I’m there! I have the philosophy that if I want something for myself of for my kids, I had better have enough energy to put into leading and supporting the other leaders or I shouldn’t do it. That is totally the truth. Because of that, I have been my son’s soccer coach for the past four or five years and before that I assistant coached an older son’s team (couldn’t do the whole thing because I had babies that were still too tiny). I lead our state LDS support group, our local LDS support group, lead the teen group in our area (all homeschooling), sit on the national LDS-NHA board and give up much of my time to homeschooling. AND THAT is just for homeschooling. Church is a whole other story, but the results are the same. If I want something I will support it with my leadership skills.
Now this wasn’t to pat myself on the back, but to show you how much I believe in leaders. I have a lot to learn in my leadership skills, but I’m trying. I’m not the best leader (just ask a local group that I just came in and stepped on everyone’s toes—wow was that a learning experience) and I’m not the best follower (ask the same group). I’m a weary leader and a burnt out leader, but I pray for guidance because I strongly believe in the causes that I’m leading.
I know Sister Beck was talking specifically to the leaders of RS groups around the globe, but I think it applies to us all. Are we leaders in our local ward or do we sit back and wait for someone else to do it? Are we leaders in our homeschooling community? Are we leaders in our civic community? Do we have the skills to be leaders? What can we do to acquire them? And then here is the big question: Where does the Lord need me to serve now?

“Every leader knows that families are being hit hard by the storms of this world, storms such as addictions, debt, unfaithfulness, and disobedience. … it is essential that the women of this Church take hold of their responsibility to be prepared in all things.”

My husband and I co-lead our family. This is not an easy task. He is a first born natural leader and I’m a first born natural leader. Talk about fireworks! And to top it off our almost 16 year old son is also a first born leader. That is usually the match that sets off the fireworks. BUT over the years we have learned to squash the fireworks and make them explode when we want and for the party.

Contrary to what many people think, I do not lead because of some ego boost, no way! I honestly do not like to be center stage! I lead because Heavenly Father gave me a talent to lead and like those who were given the talent in the New Testament, I do not want to lose all because I didn’t use the ones he gave me. Leading is not an ego boost for me. I want to make that very clear. In the last few years I have been accused of leading for an ego boost and I just want to publicly state that is NOT THE REASON I LEAD! I lead because of the blessings it brings to my family. I lead because when I was on my knees the Lord told me to get up and move and do something about what I was praying for. I lead because I believe in the cause or class or sport or more important the child that my leading will support. I don’t coach because I want to be on the top run with a gold medal around my neck. (If that was the case then I picked the wrong team to coach, my two teams have 3 wins and over 15 losses this season). I coach because NO ONE ELSE stepped forward! I coach because I love my children so much I will give up 10-20 hours a week for them! I love them enough to set aside “fun” things so I can be with them, strengthen them and make sure that they are safe. I lead because I need to and my children depend on me to be there for them.

Now that I’ve stepped off my soapbox (it is a sore subject right now), I also want to tell you how many Christ-like attributes one learns from leading. Agency is one of the first that comes to mind. You cannot MAKE anyone do something, even if you are the leader. And if they do it, it will be different than what you envisioned, and that is a guarantee! You need to learn to delegate (my worse part of leadership!) or no one else will learn to lead. When you fail, take a step back, look, learn and move forward.

These skills are vital for our children to learn.

Many years ago when I was called to be the RS President (that was the day the bishop WAS NOT listening to inspiration) I learned a lot about leadership. One of my councilors who happened to be my VT partner and I commented the morning before the call came to me that we were really good Indians abut horrible chiefs. As I left the Bishop’s office that evening and the call had been extended, my first thought was to call her to be my first councilor. Later that week she called me and told me that she was ready to be a good Indian. I chuckled and told her I really needed her to be a co-chief. She and I happened to do alright for the next couple of years. We learned how to be chiefs. We learned a lot about being Indians as well. Our children are usually pretty good Indians, but we need to teach them to be chiefs. If the gospel is to flood the earth then the Lord is going to need some chiefs to lead the way. Not for glory purposes do I hope that my kids are the chiefs, but because they have the skills the Lord needs and the testimony to support it.

Well, I better go now.